Thursday, August 29, 2013

Say, Cheese!

Man is it hard to find true vegan cheese.  It's kind of an oxymoron, right?  Vegans and cheese, even fake cheese, just don't mix.  You see, one thing I have learned over the past couple of yearss is that "vegetarian" and "vegan" don't mean the same thing on food labels.  Please do not roll your eyes, I think this is a common misconception!  I also thought anything labeled "soy" when it came to fake meat was OK too.  I was WAY wrong.  As a side note, I recently came across another blog that had some in depth research on soy.  I plan to share their perspective in a future blog entry, stay tuned.

Milk protein and eggs are commonly found in many vegetarian foods.  I was surprised to find both of these ingredients in some of the popular soy meat substitutes.  When I read a food label I always glance first at the bottom section where the common food allergies are listed and then I scan the actual ingredients.  Casein is a milk protein that shows up in foods, sometimes even when they say dairy free.

Lactose free is another term that simply helps people who are lactose intolerant continue to enjoy some of their favorite, more popular foods, like ice cream and...cheese.

I think of all the foods that I have eliminated from my diet, I miss cheese the most.  I love almost all kinds of cheese except for bleu.  And I don't like the dressing either.  Cheese just pairs well as a snack, with sparkling water, as a grilled sandwich, on crackers, with wine.  I'm having the Pavlov response just thinking about it.

So in my adventure to find a substitute to curb my cravings, I've tried several vegan cheeses.  Anything that comes in block form has not at all been close to slicing a slab of real cheese.  In most cases, the taste is horrifying and I've spit it out.  Dramatic, yes.  Shock to the taste buds in not a good way, absolutely yes. 

Sometimes the pre-cut slices of cheese that look like the packaged Kraft & Borden slices have been satisfying but they don't melt right.  In the toaster oven the edges curl upward and the cheese gets crispy rather than melting down and then there is also no taste left.  So I've asked myself, what's the point?  If I can't taste it, I don't need it.

I stumbled upon Diaya shredded cheeses, vegan.  Insert happy happy happy dance!  For the most part, they taste great, melt and mimic real cheese.  My favorite is the pepper jack.  Next would be the mozzarella, and finally the cheddar version.  The mozzarella is perfect because I can still make my 2nd favorite missed food...pizza.  It has a stronger taste so just a little bit of sprinkled over veggies is all I need.  I've also made vegan versions of baked ziti and lasagna with it that has also gotten family approval.  Bonus.  The cheddar is so-so and I don't buy it often.  When you love real cheddar and sharp cheddar cheeses as much as I do, it's really, really hard to replace.  No fault to Diaya, I hope they continue to refine the taste.  So, Diaya gets a big shout out from me.  They are awesome, and I really enjoy their shredded cheeses.

It's just nice to have an option.  A good option.  Fall is just around the corner and I am soooo looking forward to a grilled "cheese" sandwich and soup on those chilly days!   

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Kale Chips

At 9:30 tonight I decided to make kale chips.  Wasting food drives me insane and the bunches of kale I had in my fridge were starting to wilt.  Worried that it wasn't going to last much longer I thought, eh, why not make some kale chips real quick and now at 10:12 p.m. I am sitting here, munching on my baked goods alongside a can of ice cold seltzer.  Despite the time, I am thoroughly enjoying my late night snack.

What you need:

1 bunch of kale (I like the curly leaf kind)
A tablespoon or two of olive oil
Sea Salt
Fresh Ground Pepper
A couple of tablespoons of nutritional yeast (this is optional, but is vegan and gives the kale chips a cheesy taste.  It is quite good)

What you do:

Preheat the oven to 300 degrees.

I needed one large and one medium cookie sheet, lined with parchment paper.  You can use foil too.  I prefer parchment paper.

Tear the kale into 2 inch pieces.  I like to do mine a little larger where possible.  Toss the kale with the olive oil.  Sprinkle in some salt and pepper, give it a good stir and then sprinkle in a little more.  I do this for even coverage.  Mix in the nutritional yeast and continue to gently stir or fold the kale until it looks evenly covered with olive oil.

Put the kale on the baking sheets in a single layer - you can butt the pieces right up to each other because they shrink while cooking.  Make the sure the kale pieces are lying as flat as possible.

I bake mine on the 2nd rack from the bottom.  Bake for 16 - 17 minutes or until crispy.  The recipe I used as a guide said 30 - 35 minutes which would have been entirely too long.  Be careful not to over cook the kale.  It should be crispy but still green.

Well, it's 10:24 and the kale chips have been polished off.  Good night! 

Friday, May 10, 2013

Mother's Day Weekend

Happy Mother's Day! 

Tori told me last night she wanted to be a mommy when she grew up, "Just like you, Mom."  I told her that was a great goal to have, and the most important and rewarding job she could pick.  I told her that was my favorite job of all and that I loved taking care of her and her brother.  She smiled and proceeded to scamper out of the room to go potty.  Yep, good talk. 

This mother's day Russ is in Singapore on business.  It won't be the day of sleeping in, meals cooked (or rather take-out picked up), everything-done-for-mom-isn't-she-great day that I expected (or was looking forward to) as a family.  Instead, my best friend is coming in to town to watch Tori and Will while I go get a facial, maybe run an errand or two, and we get to hang out.  I get to care for and enjoy the children as I would on any other Sunday and that's all OK with me.  When I realized Russ was going to be away I was initially really bummed...mostly because of the sleeping in part!  Then my friend offered to come and we created what will be a really nice day.  Life is full and that is what counts. 

On Sunday morning when Tori wakes me up I will tell her it's Mother's Day and we will talk about all the fun things we are going to do that day.  Then we'll probably go get Will and fill him in on the plans, admire his ridiculously cute toothless smile, wake up my friend, get breakfast and see where the day takes us.  Well, it's taking me for a facial, but beyond that, the world is ours.  What more could a mom ask for?   

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Separation Anxiety

As in...mommy separation anxiety.

I work from home and since the birth of Will we decided a nanny would work best for our family.  Someone who could take Tori to pre-school and pick her up, take the children to the park and on other excursions, play dates, errands if I need something.  The goal was to imitate as much as an "office" environment as possible for me with my return to work.

Obviously, there are some things that are different simply because I work in the same place my children are being cared for.  Tori is very well aware where I am during the day...three steps away from her playroom.  While she doesn't interrupt my day very often, it is easy for the both of us to want the occasional middle-of-the-day reassurance that we're here for one another in the form of a hug & kiss or verbal acknowledgment that all is right with the world.  I also need food & water, bathroom breaks, time to pump.  All of these activities require me to leave my confined space and cross paths with the kids and their nanny. 

The nanny is great.  She is very good with the children, gives them what they need, is receptive to ideas and is their playmate.  The problem is, I am not great.  It is admittedly very challenging for me to sit here and listen to their giggles, the funny things that are said throughout the day, the pitter patter of Tori running the halls, her cries when she falls and bumps herself, and Will's cries when he is uncomfortable.  No doubt I know they are being well-cared for but sometimes I still think (selfishly) that only I could do it better.  When Will cries and I here his nanny carrying him for a nap, I instantly think...no, he's hungry or he needs a diaper change, a change of scenery or he just wants to be held and walked around.  The hard thing is though, I am not standing there watching, I am only listening so none of my ideas are necessarily right, they are all just instinctive feelings.  My own role play of the actions I would take to turn those cries into a smile.  It's ridiculous.  I know his nanny is going through all of the motions to make him happy.  Babies sometimes just have uncomfortable days.  I know this because if I think back to my maternity leave, Will cried when he was with me too.  Tori fell and bumped herself, had tantrums and your run-of-the-mill 3 year old behavior, just the same when I was home with her.  We giggled, we danced, we played.  The only difference now is, I am in here and they are out there...with someone else, and it is not me, their mom.

On the flip side, I'm not ready to be a stay at home mom.  There are some aspects to working that I need for my sanity.  Like getting dressed.  Or at least, out of pajamas.  Talking to adults, keeping my career going without having to worry about re-entering the work force in a few years.  Regular showers, breaks to go to the gym and even a little make-up.  Peace and quiet. 

It's a catch 22 for me.  It really is because I would (I think) easily give up everything I just mentioned if I could have the opportunity to be home with them.  And I grapple with what the right answer is almost every day.  Russ still needs a wife, a clean showered wife, who isn't overwhelmed when he comes home from a long day at work.  And I know for centuries mothers have stayed home full time with their kids, many with more than 2 kids, and it isn't as dramatic as I am making it sound.  But this entry isn't about everyone else.  It's about me.  And I can tell you when I was home full time, I might have been meeting the needs of the children but I wasn't meeting my own needs very well, let alone Russ'.  The best thing I do for myself is leave work at 6 p.m. and truly leave it until both of the kids are in bed if I have to absolutely return emails or catch up from a busy day.  It's only a couple of hours a day that I get with Tori and Will and some of that time is spent on feeding them, doing laundry, whatever.  I try to involve Tori in everything so she is by my side helping me or just plain keeping me company. 

This is still a new schedule for us and I hope it gets easier and that I can adapt better as time goes on.  The real problem is there is no true separation for me.  I do not get in my car and drive away or bring them to a daycare and wave good-bye.  I have begun to tune certain things out, listen to music at my desk and limit the times I leave my office to times when they are napping so I am not interrupting the nanny's flow either.  I have to imagine it is an unusual situation for her too, but she seems to be doing better with it than I am.  My heart hurts sometimes and I have never had that feeling before.  It is a true heaviness that I am struggling to shake off.

I know this blog is intended to be about wellness and the adventures of becoming a vegan.  Sometimes I have found that in the quest for overall wellness, it's more than the tangible things in life that can be or need to be changed.  I am writing this to help myself find the balance that I need to bring more happiness into my life.  And right now, more happiness means wanting to spend more time with my children.  So how do I do it?  I'll have to put more thought into it and let you know what I come up with because right now, I don't have the answer.   

 

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

I am 37 today.  And I haven't written a post for my blog since 2011.  That is about to change.  Big times, as my daughter Tori would say.

Since 2011 a lot has happened.  The events that stand out to me at this moment are: I had a baby boy named Will this past January, a major exacerbation which left me with extremely limited use and weakness in my legs for the better part of 2 months last summer, I discovered I love to swim and am equally excited about continuing to swim for my cardio workouts and general peace of mind, Tori began pre-school (!) last fall, I took an amazing vacation with my husband to Jamaica all the way back in November 2011 and I am still proudly vegan-ish.  The -ish part is for fun since I do eat fish and the occasional egg!

I have been thinking a lot lately about sitting down and picking the blog back up.  Writing was a good way for me to reflect and sort my thoughts on the things happening in my life.  Although it's a bit of tunnel vision since I am writing within my own world, maybe some of the things I share can help others.  We'll see. 

For now, happy birthday to me as I tip back a small glass of wine since I am still on the clock.  A short break never hurt anyone, and neither did a glass of wine.

Wow, am I really 37?  Don't answer that.  Cheers!   

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Is it ready yet?

I need some recipes.  Actually, I have a ton of vegan recipes, printed and neatly arranged in a folder that is easily accessible.  So what's my problem?  The problem is time.  I (we all) need more time.  Time to shop for, time to learn, time to prep and time to cook.  We all know our favorites eventually take us a minial amount of time, but in the beginning, it just simply takes longer.  And, I think I need some new vegan recipes that excite me.  I have mastered the stir fry.  I'm pretty much an expert when it comes to putting a variety of veggies into the sautee pan, adding flavor and then putting it over quinoa, rice, noodles, pasta...early on in this blog I posted my favorite recipe.  It still is, but it seems boring right now. 

So hear it is.  I have quinoa, rice, lentils, cans and cans of cannellini beans, black beans, tomatoes.  Suffice it say I have a good amount of base ingredients.  I've eaten enough eggplant this summer to turn purple and I am still scared of that section in the produce section of the grocery store where you might find swiss chard and parsnips.  Swiss who?
 
If I am going to self diagnose this post I would have to say that I am just being lazy and that I am overwhelmed with my life.  I had hoped that the grocery store would be my new playground and while I have gotten grocery list ideas from fellow MS friends following this diet, I still find myself gravitating toward instant meals.  I have "cheated" more than I would like and at the moment, I am annoyed.  I am looking for a rhythm that expands beyond the diet.  It would be great to find a natural flow from recipe discovery to shopping to cooking to tasting to incorporating a dish into our normal meal plan.  Maybe I set my expectations too high, I don't know.  I felt completely discouraged at the grocery store tonight, having more to do with the fact that I was there at 9 p.m. on a Sunday night when I had hoped to relaxing at home.  Also, it is taking longer to cycle through the dry foods we already had.  I thought initially it would be best to transition that way, but as I approach 3 months and still find myself having to work in the last of these foods, it takes more thought than I care to put towards it.  And that brings me back to my original issue: time.  I don't have the time I want to devote to this right now and because I am still a newbie, it all feels very frustrating.  When I was at the grocery store tonight I went for "staples".  Tori's milk, bread, eggs, yogurt.  I also needed to get some other items that required label reading and it took forever.  I mean, forever.  Until (and if) I get the time to really start cooking and baking from scratch, I need to carefully read the labels to find vegan shortcuts.  I am thankful for Amy's brand frozen foods.  I was thankful mostly to find her version of the vegan hot pocket.  Again I say thank you to something I can microwave!  And that is what really bugs me.  I know I will get over the "time" issue.  I always do - it goes along with the saying, "practice makes perfect".  Repetition makes time.  It does this because you become more efficient.  So what really bugs me is that we live in an instant society.  There is no delay of gratification, it all comes to us whenever we want it, and pronto.  And if it doesn't?  Well, we get anxious and impatient, and frustrated that we can't have it NOW.  So while my frozen, heat-it-up-in-the-microwave vegan burrito is great, at the end of the day it doesn't satisfy anything except my need for immediate gratification, and maybe a little nutritional value.  I am not going to become a vegan by virtue of not eating meat and dairy.  I am going to become a vegan by adopting the entire lifestyle which is making time to cook meals, making the time to learn about food and how to prepare it, and making time to enjoy the experience longer than 1 minute and 30 seconds, turn once, and cook for an additional 1 minute and 30 seconds.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Are you ready for some football?

It’s been another 10 days or so since I last had the opportunity to sit and write something meaningful for this blog.  I am going to get into football shortly, I promise.  First I want to update you on the purpose for which this blog was written: to chronicle my adventure in conforming to a new lifestyle that will help me get physically well and beat MS.  Think of it like a commercial break.  Hopefully short enough to keep you in front of the TV but long enough to be informative.  My diet continues to go well and I have been getting to the gym as I promised myself I would every morning that I work from home.  Between work and summer travels, I am visiting the gym at least 3 days a week.  While I am adjusting to that routine, I do feel better with my fitness level and expect to start gaining strength over the next two months.  I have been hesitant to set specific goals for increasing the intensity of my cardio workouts or weights for strength training so I have kept my overall routine simple: cardio and abs one day alternated with strength training of arms, legs and back the next.  The summer heat is bothersome occasionally, and I am learning to balance my workouts so I have noticed that some days I feel great and others I feel really sluggish.  It seems like it is one extreme or another so I feel confident that I am moving in the right direction but there is a definite sensitivity to overdoing it that I have to be mindful of. 

Well, if you’ve made it through the first paragraph, congratulations.  Tee hee hee.  Now I am going to get into the real substance of this blog post and talk about football.  American’s favorite past time.  Well, until someone got greedy, that is.  I am not going to discuss how I feel about the NFL lock out.  I don’t know exactly how I feel about it to be honest.  Early on I read the daily articles and people’s criticisms on the subject.  I can’t say that I see both sides, because I’m not sure I fully understand the depth of the debate.  What I do know is that it is midway through July and there is no hope at this point of any games, any time soon.  This makes me sad.  I love football and I love the prospect at this time of year of watching the preseason games.  You get to see the rookie players and even though they are just “practice” games, for some of the players it determines whether or not they are going to play the real deal.  And I always like the surprise in mid-August as summer is winding down thinking, what?  Football is on tonight?  Yes!  The rush of knowing the football season is starting is equivalent to when the first warm day of Spring arrives after a long winter and you know nicer days are ahead. 

For me football is associated with so many good things about life.  I had hoped this would be my first year participating in a fantasy league.  I started to get into football in 1997 and while it took a few years for me to catch on to the game itself, once I was settled into the rules, I started to learn about the players…recognize names, know what position they play, and who they are as players.  Can you say, thank you highlight reel??  Not only are sports highlights entertaining they are educational!  As a girl I can say, who knew?  If you ever saw the movie Something About Mary and you are a girl, you should take a hint from the movie and start watching Sports Center.  And it is even fun to still pick teams according to how stylish their uniforms are.  Really.  You might even start to associate player’s names with the colors of uniforms, it doesn’t matter, the point is, football is fun whether you are just discovering it or a long time fan.  It’s social, it’s controversial during and post season which makes great conversation at any time of the year, and there’s like 1/10 the amount of games compared to baseball and therefore, easier to follow in my opinion.  But then again, if you’re really into it, football is a major commitment every Sunday.  At least 9 hours if you try to watch the 3 scheduled games in their entirety, live.  I recommend recording the games and zipping through the commercials.  We’re spoiled now-a-days with technology, aren’t we?

Until the lockout is resolved, I have been trying to think of fun ways to still honor the football season.  If I could run I thought it might be nice to start up a flag football league.  Even the absence of running, I guess I could be the ref.  Scary!  I am also considering learning footie this year.  Some of my very close friends would be thrilled.  And what if we were able to watch a season of Replacements?  I could fill my Sundays with football themed movies as well.  I usually stop there as I don’t really want to consider the alternatives, I want football, real football!  And I can't even fathom the fact that some of my favorite players might retire...I am only speculating of course but I feel like some of them only had another year or two left in the league anyway until they made the decision to retire happily and healthy.  When football does return it will be very interesting to see what unfolds.